Explain Umineko in 50 words or less

If you flip the chessboard, you’ll see even without love neither Schrodinger’s cat or Hempel’s Raven can disprove the DESIRE for BEEEAAAAAAAAATRRIIIIIIIIICCCEEEEEEEE’s Tiny bombs.

[I’m sorry for this]

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A witch and a very incompetent teen play a game of murder chess, except the pieces can jump all over the gameboard and it’s unclear whose pieces are whose and it just really doesn’t resemble chess. Also, small bombs!

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Masochist learns to embrace his kink, and that his torturer is actually his one true love. :cackle:

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Spoilers for up to the ending in Episode 8.

Incompetant teenager debates a witch that intentionally misleads him and is suffered to watch his family suffer deaths in theoretical alternate realities which are actually fiction that is littered with metaphor presented as literal truths. His sister doesn’t get a happy ending and he dies at the end.

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Incompetent local man tries to deny witches with help of witches and lesbians on a chess game that doesn’t have anything to do with chess.

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Everyone screams, runs, fights, and dies. Mystery? Fantasy? What’s that? Extra with meta and observers. And it repeats.

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the title of this song

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Umineko is also what I first thought of when I listened to this track tbh :gold:

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I have another good one (well not as good as the other one but still).
umineko series spoilers

Umineko: how i met your mother

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Spoiler Ep6.

You’ve killed me and my family several times with strange tricks and you ordered me to watch it so that I could explain how you did it without using magic. You’ve turned my aunt into an evil witch, you made me your toy. Will you marry me?

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What can you say, even Battler couldn’t resist the charms of such a PAAFEKUTO Woman…

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18 year old Incompetent son of national playboy gets caught up in a game by a blonde crazy trap chick featuring wannabe rika and miyo, mustache butler, too many holes, cant open my eyes, crazy milfs & co.

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Dysfunctional rich perverted 18 year old guy born in a even more dysfunctional family thinks that he lives in Ace attorney’s world where his opponents are an insane but sexy blonde witch or psycho lolis. Oh did I mention the milfs and the waifu-looking demons?

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A witch tries to prove she’s real even though she sits across from the young man she’s trying to prove it to while playing games, clearly taking up space in reality; all while a small team of Japanese musicians compose the greatest music of their lives on a Yamaha keyboard.

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Hotheaded Phoenix Wright Wannabe gets constantly confused by trolling witches and his own incompetence

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Isn’t that part of the Phoenix Wright experience? :stuck_out_tongue:

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Find out what happens when a young man and his quirky family get lost in their local Ikea® and are promptly laughed at over the intercom by a fictitious being.

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cosmic lesbian foreplay

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I feel the need to necro this thread because it’s the best thread in the whole forum.
Anyways, here’s one I just thought of.

A series where even with an abusive mother, a rapist, a mass murdering witch, and a forgetful incompetent, the character you’ll hate the most is still George.

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‘Insane witch taunts and humiliates foolish young man in a game of magical family murder and chess.’

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